REFLECT DON’T RATIONALISE
The importance of practicing self-reflection cannot be understated. Delving into one’s own mind and processing one’s thoughts, reactions and responses to external situations is the first, and oftentimes hardest step in bettering oneself. Nevertheless, this is not a simple task and the complexities inherent within it can be somewhat summarised through the old proverb, ‘you cannot see the forest through the trees’. This proverb is used traditionally to expresses people’s inability to see problems as a whole, especially in circumstances where they are too attached or ‘close’ to the factors surrounding the issue. The proverb can also be utilised in explaining the primary obstacle to self-reflection, this being that people are too involved and tangled amongst their own thoughts and behaviour to identify any inherent or holistic problems with it. Consequently, people become stagnant and attribute much of their difficulties in life to purely external factors, completely negating or disregarding any self-causation for their emotional positions. One can only begin to self-develop and improve their behaviour, once they obtain a birds-eye view of the forest and no longer merely a cluster of trees.
It is also vital to maintain the ‘self’ in ‘self-reflection’ and not allow external factors, such as people and environments influence one’s evaluation of themselves. Nevertheless, in saying this, one of the most dangerous consequences of self-reflection, is self-rationalisation. This occurs when people look into themselves, evaluating their behaviour and thought processes merely from their own perspective, completely irrespective of externalities. The dangers inherent within this practice should not be undermined, as oftentimes, when one embarks upon a path of intensive self-reflection/self-development, they become unconcerned with externalities. At risk of sounding hypocritical or contradictory, a complete disregard and neglection of externalities is not appropriate and is an extremely risky method to employ in self-reflection. This is because, although not holistic and, although not unconditional, externalities can often give us feedback and indications of our behaviour. The opinions of others should not be taken as absolute and should also not be entirely disregarded. The best approach is to find a careful balance between the two, where you can utilise externalities as a yardstick without allowing them to control your ‘self’. “Live carefully, because there are people around you”.
The balance between externalities and ‘self’ is a precarious one and oftentimes difficult to strike. However, we should pursue it arduously and apply these practices. Only then can we achieve the ultimate goal of…Self-Reflection, Self-Development without Self-Rationalisation.
Thank you ZS.
